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Monday, November 29, 2010

Printer Ink

"Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos into order, confusion into clarity... It turns problems into gifts, failures into success, the unexpected into perfect timing, and mistakes into important events. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today and creates a vision for tomorrow."
-–Melody Beattie

I thought that was a nice little quote to end out Thanksgiving weekend.

Oh, there was a ton of food - two Thanksgiving dinners and few days worth of left overs says it's time to pull the plug on this weekend.

A few months ago I was standing in the middle of Office Max/Depot/whatever and I was so pissed. We have a Dell computer with a Dell all in one printer that only sells Dell ink on the Dell website. Racket! It's a racket. And I was so mad marching into this officy-superstore and not finding Dell ink. Grrr.

I stood there and started laughing at how mad I was. And then I started to think about how thankful I was that something so stupid had the privilege of pissing me off. It was a normal feeling to have - impatience, annoyance - and I thought about that time shortly after Christian's accident when our living quarters was the hospital.

Yes, I thought about all this stuff in a few split seconds.

This officy-superstore is right next door to the Target where I drug myself through the front doors while still staying in the hospital and wondering if anyone saw how much pain I was in just by looking at me. I thought while walking through those doors - Can they see it on my face that I'm in hell right now? I shouldn't be buying socks. I should be at the hospital. Don't make eye contact."

Now that's serious stuff. Those are serious worries. Not the socks part. But the hospital-I have a sick kid-my eyes are permanently puffy from crying-kind of worries.

And there I stood more then a year later in the middle of trying to find some damn printer ink and getting all flustered, NOT wondering if my child would live or not. Just worried about that damn ink.

I was so thankful that printer ink was my biggest worry, my biggest gripe at that moment. And I laughed to myself. I found some refurbished ink for Dell printers. It wasn't all that much cheaper, but slightly.

It's an odd thing, but I'm thankful for unimportant, petty, gripes. I'm thankful that the biggest annoyance in my life at any given time is that my house is messy and I can't keep up, that's shipping charges suck, or that my computer is running slow. It's petty, it's grounding, and it's normal. And I'd much rather be worried about that then whether my child will make it through the night.

On a lighter what's going on with the Ketogenic Diet?!?!

Good question.

Well, there was a hold up at the health care company. The type of formula Christian needs is not carried by our current HHC (Home Health Care Company). My first thought was that we'll have to change companies. But they told me they were finding a way to get it. Way to step up, HHC! I love proactivity.

With the Thanksgiving weekend, nobody was terribly pumped to get things done so I didn't fight. Not everything has to be a battle or an argument or a blog entry tirade. I can chill. Besides, we should have it by the end of this coming week. And there were a few appointments we needed to complete to get some baseline information for Christian and those don't happen until Tuesday. Mama bear is chillin' until then.


Anonymous said...

AMEN!!!!! Thankful for petty shit as well :)

Lisa & Brock

Anonymous said...

Staple carries Dell ink.

Alicia said...

I hear you. I remember thinking, after Rissa was born, how I would never go back to worrying and stressing about "normal" stuff again. Yet, here I am, getting pissed that I can't find the right brand of alfredo sauce at the store! Ain't it awesome? Love ya!

Reece said...

Your blog and posting helps keep me grounded. When I get really frustrated and angry about all the things i have going on in my life (abusive ex hubby, raising 3 kids alone for a while, finacial strain to the max, etc) I come to your blog and I read. I read about your worries and your concerns and they seem so much more worthy of worry than mine are. It puts my mind in a grateful state and it helps me to focus on what is important and it helps me not to sweat the petty things. I want to say thank you and that I love reading about your loving family. Your blog not only informs us about your life with Christian, it heals me and grounds me in ways that you might not ever consider. I admire you and look up to you for putting your son first and not letting this world get in the way of your committment to his healing.

ShaunaQ said...

Lisa- LOL :)

Anonymous - Thanks for the heads up! We just ran out of printer ink again! Curse you, Dell!

Alicia - It IS important to get the right Alfredo sauce! That is a big deal around here, too!

Reece - Thank you for your awesome comments! Thank you for reading and I admire you for being the Supermom YOU are!

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